So much to talk about.
Wonderful weekend. Got together with a friend of ours at the local club that Mary and I go to, and I had a ball. Poor Mary was stuck at home coughing up a lung. Friday night was the worst of it, and she had her crisis, it passed her by, but she still couldn’t stand up straight. So Narcissa andI went to the club.
The problem is that she lives about an hour and a half away from us by car, and as she was coming down the road, her oil pan plug blew out. Thankfully she was close enough to where I was to meet her, that I just took her to our house.
She bought me some leather, I spent Saturday, Sunday and part of Monday making toys for her. Nice times too.
Why do I mention all this? I think Mary and I may have found our third. We have been actively looking for someone to join us for a while now. Like, for about 12-13 years. But we have been being very descreet and very discerning, since we don’t want just anyone coming into our family. Plus we had a long list of qualities that we needed the mythical person to join us needed to have.
Why do I mention this? I think she’s it. Compatable religious beliefs. Same types of kink and sexual appetites. Same basic belief structure, many likes and dislikes that we have. Similar tastes in music and things like food and TV/Films. She’s not put off by many of the problems that I have and Mary has, as she has her own set of problems that we can help with.
I talked to her, along with Mary and she’s accepted, tentatively. She’s got a chance at her dream job, and she finds out if she gets it after the 16th. If she does, she’s moving to CA and we won’t see her again. If not, the we move forward.
But we do this slowly. She is not just some caricature, and Mary and I have been going slowly for some time. Because this is going to involve sacrafices on both sides. She is going to have to give up privacy and her time and attention, we will have to move. Our fortuntes will have to comingle, and it will be all for one (the family). It will be hard.
I have been around other polyamorous groups, and I have seen some of the problems they have. I don’t want that to be us. I want it to be a group marriage, where Mary and her are getting what they need as well as me. I don’t want it to be “Daven’s Harem” or anything like it.
That’s the news. We may have another in our marriage. We may not, as well. It all depends on the luck of the draw.
So this weekend was getting to know each other. The ONE problem we have already spotted that may make or break this is money. Like that is NEVER a consideration…. The base of the matter is that Mary and I have learned to pay the bills first, then spend for pleasure. It looks like (at this point) that she spends and doesn’t worry about the bills until later. That’s my mother’s way of doing things, and it means that my mother is constantly in a state of crisis with the finances. So we have to talk to her. It can be worked out, but it will take some time and effort on everyone’s part.